Steph.Addiction

Posted Friday, January 25, 2008 // 0 comments (+)

T_T suppose tomorow i'm going out movie with ah fu to watch game plan T_T
i thought she's the one whom her parents don't approve but it turned out to be mine T_T
my mom was tooooooooo busy with her tuitions and all that. and it makes me very depressed.
you know? just like what the tv show lo.. those parents nowadays who are damn busy until they don't even have the time to take their daughter to see doctor.. i'm like that T______T
i know i should not blame on her cuz she's really tired already. morning working,come back home have to clean the house and cook and get ready cuz her tuition students coming,then only free.
and i understand why she earn so much money is all because of us. triplets aint easy to bear. T_T
i'm sorry mom. but its hard to make me not sad also....... i told you mentioned to you so many times and just wanna go for a movie after so long i did not go out.. but you just rejected me so hard.. and it broke my heart.. i'm thinking,isit i must show face whenever you're around? must i stomp the floor and bang the door just to show you how angry i am and make you feel guilty of what you've done? i don't wanna be such a spoilt kid that don't know how to be in my mom's shoes.
but i really hope that you do have some free time for us,even only 2 days per week? is that ok?
my dad is busy with his work too..but compared to my mom,he's must more free. he have the time to sleep,have the time to exercise,have the time to watch football,have the time to read.
but not my mom. she doesnt even have time to get sick. and recently something happened to her friend,her husband having affair with another woman. and this also must tell my mom ke?! cant you all just solve it out and give some time for my mom to rest?!
i know instead of blaming,i should start realizing what mistakes i've done to get treated so bad by my mom. everything we want,she'll reject. i know deep down inside her heart,she knows she can make it. just like fetch us for a movie. its just so easy and its not some big deal. i know she knows that. but she just wanna show some anger or ego for us so that she hope us to know she's very sanfu already cuz of her career and whole family. T__________T
i should not compare her with my friend's mom,instead,i should compare her to those whom their mom treat them worse than my mom. so that i'll get comforted instead of being hurt.
sometimes a children leave house,argue with parents,some even commit suicide,do not blame it on internet,do not blame it on others will you? why don't you think whats your responsible for making your child desperate to leave away from your control? have you really communicate with us? honestly,after so long i'm alive,i havent told my mom any secrets at all. who i like,who i dislike,what i like,what i dislike. its not i don't wanna tell.. its whenever i tell,she'll show those angry faces and those get-annoyed faces to me. i know she undergo alot of pressures already and come home still wanna get headache with this family. i'm sorry T_T but can you sometimes just give me a smile when i wanna ask bout something? or even nod your head when i request bout something that's ok for you? money is not everything,you lose money,you can always earn back.but not your family you know. i'm the one who knows all about the importance of being courteous to family,i wanna make my family a happy family. but its not just depend on me. it depends on the whole family members and work it out together in order to have a blissful and happy family. but my father is just too quiet. he's born like that. he'll only speak when there's topic that suit him. bf and gf?! a big no no. whenever he hears that,he'll strictly forbid that topic and just ended up the whole conversation with this : i don't wanna hear about all this. wats important now is your studies. yes,he frowned and say that. how hurt could that be.
you thought with your words like this,can stop your children from falling in love? stop your children from showing any interest on someone? stop your children to understand why your heart beats when the one you love is around? the world is changing,and if you're still using the old same way to teach your children,thats not gonna work. that will make them lost track with you, a big gap between both of you. not even having any conversations for a day cuz the children might just think whatever they like, is wrong to you. i always admire those whom their parents know about their every single stuff. some even buy bra & panty with her mommy,some show her mommy bout the pictures they just took in their cameras,some show her mommy whats fashion nowadays,some show her mommy their boyfriend. well i'm not saying thats good to have a boyfriend anyway,at least they just got something to chat with. sigh.. but thanks to my parents,they teach me what its like to be a parents that children love the most.